True story.

'twas an ordinary Friday evening on a cold January night,
when young Bebop strung along, slowly, with all his might,
trying to reach the pub, trying to stay sober,
first went for a bite to eat while the night grew even colder.

He got him a young lass to do his bidding,
fill the little black book of leather and silk.
So she did, honestly, no kidding,
wrote the first line: I LIEK CHOCOLATE MILK.

For she began writing after many o' drinks,
when they later went to Nott
to appreciate a different setting
to see another lass, to see what she's got.

She offered some tea, some juice, some coffee
to which he replied with a shake of his head
she shrug her shoulders like S. M. Gellar in "Buffy",
so he said he'll just have some cocoa instead.

---

Right. Enough of that. I'm clearly not doing this whole thing as bad poetry.

After my very usual dinner at Ruunipizza, I got to Möku at about 8 pm and saw that much like the previous Friday, Kris and Rauno were working the bar. Even before I got to lay down my stuff, the two got started. Rauno offered a quarter liter of vodka on the house and many other things, when Kris said he'd give me a keg of beer. Now, you can get about 50-55 glasses of beer with just one keg, so it's safe to say that I was tempted. I could have just thrown my silly project out of the window right there, enjoy a cold beer and have a very fun night with some friends.

Some half an hour later, my trusty companion for the evening arrived. I bought her a drink and told her about the sad life of sobriety. Funny, if you think about it, explaining sobriety to a drinker.
The night went slowly at first, but at one point got pretty loud and the weirdest part about that was that the bartenders were the loudest of the bunch, having some sort of a friendly argument with a group of people. I didn't really delve in the conversation, but from what I heard, they were discussing comparing penis sizes with one's father. While this was weird enough, at one point they managed to change the subject to comparing pinkies and decided that they would hold a contest to find out who had the longest pinkie. They managed to include the whole bar and everyone would line their hand on the toilet door and Kris marked up the size comparison. Apparently I came in third of the whole group, Fred won by about a mile, the freak of nature, and Rauno got the last place, to which he exclaimed that a 'study' was held, that proved that statistically, men with shorter pinkies have longer penises.

As I got ready to order my next drink, I figured I'd have something I have never had at Möku. Something nostalgic, sweet and nice. I told Rauno that I'd like a drink and he told me I could have anything as long as it wasn't tea, coffee, juice or water. I told him that I want Lemonade. The original Lemonade made in Tartu. The good stuff. Now, as Lemonade looks pretty much like a strong cider, many people who knew about my sobriety pledge were surprised and wanted to know if I'd given up or something. So in conclusion: Successful troll is successful.

Right. As me and my trusty companion got tired of the ruckus the group beside us was making, and the penis jokes, we decided to leave. So on this Friday came one of the earliest retirements from Möku for myself. We left at about half past 10 pm and headed towards Nott. As it was pretty much freezing outside, we got a pleasant surprise, when we found Nott heated by an industrial-grade gas heater used to heat construction sites. This thing was pretty much a flamethrower and made the place hot like a sauna. I need to get one of those things. When not heating the room, it could be used to warm up dinner or fry a marshmallow.
The main reason we went to Nott in the first place was because I had some friends there, including Neidy and Kristina behind the bar. As I was on my strictly no alcohol diet and was drinking primarily tea, I asked Neidy what they had and after I heard they had chocolate milk, I couldn't resist, even though because of a minor problem with lactose intolerance it is ill-advised to have milk-related products. Since we figured we'd call it a night soon anyway, I figured what's the worst that could happen. No, nothing happened, you evil bastards.

Over the course of the evening I noticed that me and my companion for the evening have a very different taste in women. Whenever I would point out the good looks of a girl, she would disagree and whenever she would do the same, I would not find that particular girl very attractive. I can't say I've ever had such different tastes in women with a close friend before. Very refreshing, but must remember to not have her set up any blind dates.
I didn't actually plan to make a post about this Friday, so I neglected to fill my black book with all the things that happened over the course of the evening. Not that many things did happen. Anyway, at one point while already at Nott, my trusty companion decided that she would start filling the book for me. I thought this would be an excellent idea, as I've pretty much grown tired of doing it and sadly people weren't scared of that book at all. Anyway, as she filled the book while not very sober anymore, I can't read some things she wrote.
Oh, she did however have fun trying some interesting shots. I bought her a Slippery Nipple, described in one of the earlier posts, and some time later a very interesting liqueur called Fishshot, which supposedly tastes exactly like Fisherman's Friend, if you've ever tasted it. Strong stuff, but very beneficial if you have throat trouble of some sort due to the weather being as cold as the 9th level of hell. Oh, and Slippery Nipple has Sambuca. Don't mind this last sentence, I'm just mentioning this, so my trusty companion can remember that she wanted to buy some.

We also thought that we should hold a meme party, where everybody would show up wearing a meme-themed mask and get shitfaced. That sounded more fun in a bar-environment than it does now, but it's definitely something to consider. Not before February though, I don't want to be sober for that.

So, in conclusion, the night was very cold, but also quite fun. We left Nott at about half past twelve and I got to bed at about 2 am, which is quite unusual.

By the way, as it would appear, this is the last weekend of January. As I'm probably not going out on Saturday due to my mother's birthday party, or even if I would, there wouldn't probably be anything to write about, this could quite possibly be the last post about my sad little project.
Next Friday will be the 3rd of February, so I plan to have a drink or twenty and celebrate not being an alcoholic. If I have proven anything to myself, it's that I'm not addicted to the drinks, I'm addicted to the socializing that goes with it, which is coincidentally a lot more fun when I'm not sober.

Expect a post about next Friday, as I plan to describe the end of my sobriety, or at least try to.

Bunch of animals in this town

It's Friday and I've been sober for 19 days. That is a lot. I can now safely say that my health has approved greatly and my apathy towards drunk people has fallen drastically. Being sober is feeling good, but at the same time being horribly bored most of the time. I mean, sure, I've had a lot of interesting encounters and I've had some fun, but you cannot really compare it to anything done while being intoxicated. I'm still not sure this was a good idea, but I have learned a great deal from the experience so far.

So Friday. I finished work a little bit earlier and went to Ruunipizza for a cheese & ham pancake at about 7pm. Nothing too unusual there, so moving on. I went to Möku right after, found a cozy seat in the corner and begun observing the nature around me. It really is a jungle out there, Monk was right. There were a bunch of French people in the bar and today we had Kris and Rauno working the bar. Soon after my arrival, Crow, who I had a previous arrangement set up, arrived. She ordered a drink and we went on discussing stuff in general.
Right around the same time, Snowmonkey came around to greet me. Apparently she is an avid reader of this here blog, so thank you, Snowmonkey, for kind words. She left soon after, so I didn't actually get to talk to her a lot. The evening was slower than usual or maybe I was just more bored than usual. I'm getting used to this sobriety thing, so I'm not sure if I'm the one who is more bored or it was just a slow night.
At one point, we got to talking about some music and we ended up watching a bunch of really cool guitar videos. After that, Crow apparently got bored, so she found some friends and sat at their table. As I was at the bar, and I really enjoy being at the bar, I stayed there, alone.

For a while, nothing happened. Kris played some music from Lion King and I realized that I've never seen Lion King 2. Should probably watch it. As I was bored and didn't think the night would go anywhere, I wrote "OH SHIT" in my little notebook, thinking that I would simply make something interesting up to spruce up this otherwise uninteresting post. So here goes.
    I was just sitting there minding my own business, when suddenly Lars Ulrich from Metallica jumped in and declared, that the SOPA act was a great idea and we are all stupid for thinking that the internet is supposed to be free. I went on to argue with Lars about SOPA, general legislation and, for some reason, the correlation between the size of his shoe and the weather we've been having recently. Some people were visibly upset by Lars's views on SOPA and he was asked to leave.


Right, back to reality. I've written down, that I should ask something about Crow's hair, but as my notes aren't always very specific, I honestly don't remember what we talked about and I'm not sure Crow remembers either. Moving on.
Soon after we were joined by Lynx, who was sad for some reason, but didn't wish to elaborate on the subject, so we left her be. Crow was pretty much between two groups at this point and also getting rather tipsy. I didn't mind, as I know Crow and she doesn't get obnoxious when she's drunk. I talked to Lynx for a while, but as I couldn't think of anything to discuss, she must have gotten bored, so she finished her drink and left. While outside, I noticed again the high concentration of Frenchmen. For some reason this was the Friday they all got together. Actually, they do that a lot, but I'm usually not sober, so I don't notice them all that much. The fact is, there was a lot of chatter in French, so quite interesting and international. At least I think it was interesting, as I don't know a word in French myself.

At one point, Crow found that if you cover up a part of the logo on my notebook, it would appear as the trumpet player on the logo is actually drinking from a bottle. We figured this would be a fitting alteration to the notebook, we should paint the part black using a marker, but apparently someone had stolen Möku's marker. Bunch of savages in this town..
Soon after I got bored again and figured I'd just join Crow and her friends. It was a little bit hard to give up my warm spot at the bar for a seat practically in the middle of the room, but social interaction with people I actually know would be a better idea than sitting at the bar, staring at the screen and hoping for some social handout by a random appearance of a friend or even a stranger.

So I joined the group. There were Crow, Fox, Human and a few others. Human was particularly active and possibly very drunk, as I've never seem him in this state. He didn't seem too drunk, but his actions convinced me otherwise. At some point Crow and Human made a bet about who would drink something the fastest. As they couldn't agree on a drink and Crow was already quite drunk, they instead decided to have a shot and see who gets the worst reaction. After a lengthy debate, they settled on the Portal shots, which consists of two consecutive shots to be had one after the other, one blue and the other orange. While they went off to order the shots, I stayed with Fox. Now, some of you may know that there is a popular beer by the name of Porter. Actually I'm pretty sure that's a type of beer. Anyway, Fox speculated on a situation, where if he would run out of porter, could he order the next one by simply shouting Reporter. An interesting play on words, good Fox. Very interesting indeed. I found this amusing.

Soon after Crow and Human returned with their custom shots. After drinking them, neither had any notable reaction, so we called it a tie and they both agreed that the shots were delicious, which is strange, as the last time I had Portal shots, they weren't tasty at all. Must have been the drinks they had beforehand. A correct amount of booze can make many things taste a lot better, especially more booze.
Some time later, we were joined by Dog, who ordered a drink and sat down. Soon after, Fox expressed the urgent need for nutrients and declared that they would go and find something to eat. When Fox and Human left, our group had suddenly dried up. Now there were only me, Crow and Dog. We had some general conversation about general things and at one point Crow decided to follow Fox and Human to wherever they had gone to. As Crow left, I now had only Dog to keep me company. Soon after, Dog's colleague and friend Lizard, who had just gotten off work, joined us. As you would imagine, in a situation, where there are two colleagues and a random sober guy, Lizard and Dog began talking and the conversation soon led to heated arguments about work. As I know nothing of that, I just sat there, idly observing them and everybody else.

The bar was quite full of people at that point and I even spotted a few familiar faces, who I hadn't seen for a while. I'm pretty sure some of them didn't even see me, or didn't want to see me, who knows. I know I tend to be quite boring when I'm sober, so it's okay. As per usual, I don't like when there's a lot of people in Möku and I'd been thinking about leaving for a while. As Dog and Lizard had to work the next day, they finished their drinks and we decided to leave. We said goodbye to Lizard and me and Dog, as Dog lived in the general direction of where I was heading, went towards Zavood. I said goodbye to Dog in front of Zavood and headed inside.

There I found my old friend Sloth, who was quite drunk and accompanied by his girlfriend Fish. I spent a bit of time in their company, discussing that I should get together with Sloth some day to have a drink, to which I added that it wouldn't happen before February. We've had many talks about this with Sloth before and it hasn't really happened. I guess I should make an appointment or something. At one point there was a discussion about how Fish's real name is written and in the process my notebook was used for examples. This didn't make me happy. I stayed in Zavood for a bit more, but as I didn't find anything to do there, I figured it was about time to call it a night. Going past Krooks I didn't really want to go inside, so I skipped that one.

On my way home, a little bit before Krooks, I saw a group of drunk youngsters, of which some were probably too young to drink I'm sure. First, I received a friendly hug from two girls who I didn't know. That was nice and positive of them. I hope they gave a lot of hugs that evening and made many people a little bit happier, as I sure was. There were also some boys in the group, who apparently found someone's trash bin and threw it around in the middle of the street with the contents spewing about. A fitting end to a night filled with all sorts of animals, luckily mostly good and fun animals.

Bunch of animals in this town...

P.S. The 'savages' (or 'animals' in this case) quote is from the movie Clerks. An excellent movie.

P.P.S. All in all, the night wasn't as bad, as it would seem from the negativity plaguing this sad post. It is entirely possible that I was in a bit of a bad mood, but the fact is that it would have been way more fun if I wasn't sober. Gosh, just one weekend to go. Still not sure if I want to get drunk, but being outside while sober is just sad. At this point I completely understand sober people who don't like going out. Also, I've ended every sober pub night at about 1 am, which never happened when I was drinking. Maybe sobriety does make me a normal person, who knows.

P.P.P.S. If the SOPA act would have survived the anger of the internet, which we now know it didn't, this post would probably be illegal due to references to Clerks. I could have faced up to 5 years in prison for this. Thank you, internet.

Superhero Friday

Hello, dear minions. It's Friday the 13th and it's been twelve days since I last had a drink. I would like to write about how difficult it's been and how horribly bored I am and how I really really need a drink, but honestly I'm doing great. With the amount of booze I've poured down my throat in the last few years would surely make me addicted, but I'm not even very tempted to drink.

So this Friday started out like most Fridays. I got off work at 7pm and went to Ruunipizza for a bite to eat. Their pancake with ham and cheese is simply wonderful. After my light supper, I headed to Möku.
This time Roosi and Aadi were serving drinks. I ordered a mint tea and took a seat. Next to me I found a pal of mine, who shall henceforth be known as Green Lantern. His choice, not mine. I've been seeing a lot of Green Lantern in the past month or so. He told me a very graphic story how he was there yesterday with his ex-girlfriend, who apparently emptied herself right there on the floor. Not very encouraging. I was, once again, happy to be sober. The evening went on and Green Lantern was discussing Magic the Gathering with Aadi. Apparently some of those collectible cards, which have no signs of any copy protection, can go up to 2,500€ a piece, if very rare. Sounds like an evil plan to me.

Green Lantern noted, that some people tend to look a lot like their profession, and apparently I do, too. I don't know how much I look like an IT-guy, but apparently I do. Makes sense, as I've been doing it all my life and like it very much. Go figure. I couldn't tell, by Green Lantern's looks, who he should be.
Being Friday the 13th, a lot of weird stuff happened to people over the course of the day. My good friend sprained his ankle quite badly, so that was pretty much the topic of the day. I had the same thing happen to me almost three years ago, so I know what the poor bastard has to go through. I even tried contacting a few people about crutches for the poor fellow, but alas, no avail. You see, if you're in Tartu and you break a leg on a Friday, you have to go the whole weekend without crutches, as the place that sells and rents the stuff is only open on work days and not too late, not to mention that it's at the far end of the city.
This gave us an idea, a future business venture, if you will. I'm not going to go ahead with it, so I don't mind sharing it. Maybe someone picks this up and creates a lucrative business, who knows. So the idea is to have a place that would rent and sell crutches and stuff like that on weekends. It might even have a delivery service. A young man next to Green Lantern even figured it could be a website. Kark24 or similar. Great idea, don't you think?

So anyway, the night continued, but there were still not too many people in Möku, so we were feeling pretty great. I ordered a peculiar cocktail, which we thought of on the spot. It's pretty much a bottle of Schweppes Russchian and some orange juice. At first the taste was quite nice, but the end got a bit too bitter for my taste, but I guess some would like that. No alcohol, still sober.
We had an interesting discussion with Green Lantern on people who look like celebrities. Apparently there are at least two people in Tartu who look exactly like Johnny Depp. Good for them, I guess.
Another thing to mention is the shirt Roosi wore today. It was a cool red shirt with some buttons on it, meaning it was easy to unbutton. As the shirt was just the right size, Roosi could button it up and when she pulled her shoulders back, the shirt would become unbuttoned at the top. We had quite a laugh about the shirt. Great fun.

Some time later, when the bar was already quite full of people, a girl, who shall from this point forth be known as Catwoman, arrived. I'd been expecting her earlier, but apparently she took her time getting there and made it exactly when most people did. Catwoman had a beer and when she was half way done with it, the bar was so full it was getting uncomfortable, so we decided to finish our drinks and head to Zavood, which usually doesn't get too full of people before midnight. While Catwoman drank the beer, we were interrupted by Andrei, an annoying person known to many in these parts. He's not so bad when he's sober, but he usually isn't. I noted, that Andrei is a lot like herpes, because whenever you think he is gone, he somehow manages to show up again, usually at the most inconvenient moment. After I told dear old Herpes to not bother us, he left us alone to bother some Frenchmen at the other end of the bar. Some time later Catwoman finished her drink. I didn't see Aadi at the time so I only got to say goodbye to Roosi and we went on our merry way, towards the end of most nights - Zavood.
Oh, and right before leaving Möku a young man stopped me and told me that he liked my blog, This Blog, very much. He had a beer in hand and told me that he would drink that beer in the honor of my now apparently quite popular project. Thank you, young fan!

As expected, Zavood wasn't too full yet and we found a nice place by the window and decided to wait for people to show up. I noticed that we got there at about 11pm. I got a beer for Catwoman and a virgin Cuba Libre for myself. Yes, that is just coke. I had the bartender put some ice and lemon in it, so people would think I'm drinking an actual Cuba Libre. Later I found a flier on the table that had a picture of a Cuba Libre, but with a slice of lime instead, so it would seem I failed at that, too. Oh well.
We sat there with Catwoman for quite a while and for a moment I thought we'd be sitting there all night, no friends or anything. It wasn't a bad thing, not at all. We discussed my blog and I showed her my little black notebook, from which she pointed out the word treepy, mentioned in a previous post, and I showed her the music video that gave us the idea for this peculiar word. I knew treepy would be famous!
A little bit after I had my Forever Alone moment we were joined by two friends, one of them will be called Chuck Norris (whoever dares to say that he isn't a superhero will have to answer to Chuck Norris) and the other Danger Mouse. Apparently they weren't familiar with my quest for sobriety, so I explained the situation and they seemed to like the idea. Chuck Norris even dropped a very interesting remark I hadn't heard before. Apparently, Chuck Norris knows all the digits of Pi.

So I sat there, with Catwoman, Chuck Norris and Danger Mouse, drinking my virgin Cuba Libre and discussing general stuff, when we are joined by a young man I met on Kevinday, who from now on is known as Superman. He was quite drunk, but as I explained my quest for commonly known superheroes, he understood my predicament and joined in. After a short while Superman got up and decided to bring everyone a beer. I declined gracefully, but figured I should go to the toilet. On my way, however, I was stopped by a girl, who shall now be called Lois Lane. Amazingly she did not know Superman personally and I didn't get the chance to introduce them, as she invited me for a game of Foosball. I forgot I had to pee and went on to lose two games against some young men who I didn't know personally. Let it be known that these two were the only games I lost that night. I don't want to lose my legendary street cred on this. Those were my first two games of the night and I tend to suck at 2 vs 2, so I consider myself excused. Sorry, Lois Lane.
After losing twice against those two (probably) semi-professional players, Lois Lane had to go home, so we went outside, had a little chat and she went on her way.

Meanwhile, an old acquaintance of mine, who shall henceforth be called Rorschach, managed to sit where I had left my stuff. As Rorschach was about to return my seat, the young men who I had lost twice against in Foosball asked me for another game, but as we got to the table, it was already occupied, so I went back and asked Rorschach to free my seat, again. He did so and got himself another chair.
At this point Zavood was already quite full of people and I soon noticed an old friend of mine, who shall now be called Batman, in the distance. Batman and his friend (no, not Robin), who as a group called themselves Karlova Gang 2, just came in to check who's in, but as we talked next to the Foosball table, I offered to have a game or two. Since they admitted to not being too good at Foosball, I figured I could take them 2 vs 1 and I won the game 6:4. Yes, I am very proud of this. Batman's friend was actually quite good and mid-game some girls showed up, who Batman called the Kevins for some reason, and started interrupting my 2 vs 1.
Anyway, after that one game, we had another one with the girls on either side and our side managed to end the game with 8:2. Good game, unfamiliar girl, good game indeed.

As Batman, his friend and the Kevins went on with their evening, I decided to join Catwoman and the group, but soon discovered that Chuck Norris and Danger Mouse had left and in their stead there were a couple of people I'd never met before. Who knows, maybe they transformed to hide their identities. Also, Rorschach had taken my seat again, so went out to cool down after two strenuous games of Foosball. Boy, I like that game...
After I had cooled off in the company of Rorschach, I returned to find Catwoman with some girl I'd never met. We were introduced and apparently Catwoman and the girl had the same first name, so I shall call the girl the Second Catwoman. No point in naming her, however, since I didn't have a lot of interaction with her. I soon found myself standing in the middle of the room, sober and with nothing to do, until I saw Jeka. He asked how fared my sobriety and told him about the blog. I do like telling people about this thing.
Soon after that I was bored again and since the night didn't seem to be going anywhere, I found it best to leave. I said my goodbyes to Catwoman and some other people and went towards Krooks, as it is on the way home. I stepped into Krooks and didn't find many familiar faces, except Batman, who had made his way there with his friend and the Kevins. Since Krooks was very crowded at the time, I waved Batman goodbye and left.
I pushed Play on my tiny music box and walked home, with snowfall straight to my face and a limited field of vision. I didn't find any money this time.
It must have been under the snow.


P.S. I'm not sure about the next post, as I plan to LAN away with some friends on Saturday and that wouldn't probably make for a very interesting read. However, if something interesting does go down, I will probably write about it. I'm almost half-way done with my sobriety and so far haven't had any problem, if you don't consider being bored a problem. Tonight was not boring at all, so there seems to be some hope still left for humanity. I mean sobriety.

The adventures of Loss and Redemption

Good day. As I was way too lazy to make a post yesterday evening or as some might call it early Sunday morning, and since I was out all day, this post will have Sunday as a bonus.

So let's begin with Saturday. Since my memory is pretty much as bad as it's always been, this time I brought along a little black notebook to document my progress throughout the evening, with timestamps and everything. Oh, how I will make people hate this little book. [queue evil laughter]
I arrived to Möku at 19.28 and found it to be quite empty, as it usually is at this time on any given Saturday night. There were but a few people besides myself, Maria and Kristina, who were working on that day. Soon after my entrance I proudly exclaimed, that I will not be needing alcoholic beverages this evening, to which Maria explained my little project. So it appears, that Kristina is also doing the same thing in the exact same timeframe. I sense a celebration of our mutual success some time early February. After all, I have all my dear friends helping me on my journey of sobriety offering me free drinks and mocking me for being boring and not drunk at all. Am I really That entertaining when drunk?

As the night progressed, we discussed many of fine topics, one of which was about the worst combination of illnesses one could have at the same time. When I had told a story about the time I had a stomach flu and a hangover at the same time, Maria told a peculiar story about a friend of hers who had a stomach flu and a serious cough at the same time. It took a couple of minutes to stop laughing at the very picturesque situation that poor person had to go through.
Some time later, a girl arrived, who I shall henceforth call Loss. Why? Mostly because she's the main character in this story, while me myself would be Redemption. Blame Kevin.
Apparently Loss came from a funeral of some relative she wasn't acquainted with personally, so it wasn't much of a downer for the evening. Note that at this point Loss was quite sober.
Nothing much happened for a while besides some general chatter about general things. The night was mellow and the bartenders were playing all kinds of interesting songs with sometimes weird and surreal videos. One of those I found quite creepy, but at the same time kind of trippy. By combining the two, we figured out a general word to describe this weird and unusual situation - Treepy. Remember this word, kids. When you grow old and become creepy perverts with a weird post-drug trippiness, your kids might start saying you're being treepy. I'm rather proud of that one.

At one point, my trusty sidekick Loss received a free beer, which was either the end of an old keg, the beginning of a new one or a combination of the two. This made her quite happy and sitting there with two glasses of beer she exclaimed that the two glasses were like breasts, while rubbing them in a manner a girl would imagine men would. Yes, she was getting a bit drunk and my night was getting a little bit more interesting, one drink at a time.
Some time later a young man recognized me as the person who writes a blog about sobriety. As I don't know that young man personally, I figured that this must be what fame feels like. Apparently he found this blog because I posted a link of it on Kevin's blog and apparently liked it. Thank you, kind stranger. Excuse me for not knowing your name, I shall refer to you as Kevin. I did recognize Kevin's face, so I guess he must be one of the regulars that came in with the real Kevin.

After my fourth or fifth consecutive cup of tea I decided that it would be time to switch to softer stuff, so I ordered a glass of water with some ice and lemon. A funny thing about this drink. They served it in a glass I usually drink beer out of and for a brief moment it felt like I belonged there in the midst of people who actually drank beer out of these glasses. This made me feel good, because being sober in the middle of a bar full of drunk people was still weird. I'm pretty sure that feeling won't go away in time and that is the exact reason non-drinkers prefer to stay away from places such as bars and clubs. I understand those people better each day I spend in Möku without a face full of beer.
As the night progressed, there was another interesting subject I would like to mention. We discussed cats and what is going on in their head and while even the sober me cannot put in words the thoughts of a cat, Loss explained in these words: "Hey, hey, hey, woo!". I think that could have had a deep philosophical meaning, which I in my sobriety was unable to fathom. Thinking back on that fascinating description of the psyche of a cat, she might have been quite right.

At about 11 pm, me and Loss found that it would be an interesting idea to visit Nott, as it had been open for the second day after a long pause because of some sort of problem with plumbing, which I shall not delve into right now. We decided that we would finish our drinks and pay the old place a visit. Loss said Nott reminded her of a train station. I hadn't thought about it in that way, but I guess it's a possibility to describe that place, as it is usually crowded, with a really long bar which reminds a ticket line and the room is kind of long and not too wide.
About ten minutes before leaving, a friend of mine arrived, who I shall henceforth call Kevin, because I can't think of a better name right now. She told us that she was going to a club with a mutual friend of mine and hers and is currently in the process of waiting for him. Since there was no sign of the man and me and Loss already finished our drinks, she decided to join us in our venture to Nott. So there we were, Kevin, Loss and Redemption, walking through the cold night toward our next adventure.

We arrived at 11.35 pm and found that Nott was quite full of people. We soon discovered that the friend Kevin was supposed to meet was already there to greet us. Kevin and the friend had a drink with us, Loss and Redemption were not drinking. After a few minutes I remembered that Nott served a very curious little shot called the Slippery Nipple. Loss found the name curious and I offered to buy her one. I had another good friend working at Nott that night, so I received my shot quite quickly. It was only when I gave the drink to Loss I remembered that Loss didn't like Bailey's, which was a key ingredient in the shot. Nevertheless, she drank the shot and actually enjoyed it very much. We sat there for a while longer, discussing different topics, including the black little notebook Loss learned to hate already. Some half an hour after arriving, we decided that Möku was better and went back.

We arrived at 12.10 pm and at that point Möku was quite full of people. We managed to find a seat in the corner near the entrance and spent most of the rest of the evening there. At one point we got closer to the bar and I also got to sit for a little while.
As Loss is quite short, she found sitting in the corner fascinating, as it was low enough for her to hit her head on the ceiling. Möku has an arch-type ceiling, which is lower in the corners, so when standing on the leg-rest of the chair, she was able to touch the ceiling with her head. Loss was very proud of her accomplishment.
After that, time pretty much flew, as nothing noteworthy happened and I was getting rather bored.
At one point Riho showed up, which was very much a surprise for me, as when I last saw him on the first of January, he was going to the army and I figured I wouldn't see him for at least a couple of months. He went on to tell me how he enjoys his life in the army. Can't relate, as I've never been in the army, but I'm happy for him.

As Loss was already very drunk, we decided that it would be time to call it a night. We gathered our things and went on our merry way. We left at 2.12 am. I got some cash for the cab fare and gave Loss a ride home and went home myself. I had a very interesting chat about sobriety and smoking with the cab driver.
In the aftermath I am a little bit sorry that I didn't go to Zavood as I had thought I would, because at about half past four am, I received a text from Kevin, that there was a good female friend of mine and she was kissing a person, who I shall not name here. Let's just say it was a weird thing to imagine and I'm guessing an even weirder thing to observe.

Bonus track: Sunday.
I really wanted to write this post on the early hours of Sunday, but I was feeling much too lazy and figured I'd do it later. I woke up at about half past 2 pm and noticed a text from a dear friend of mine who was having a birthday in half an hour. I quickly got up, called her about me being late, took a shower, had a late breakfast and got there a bit before 4 pm. The birthday sitting was at Big Ben pub. It was a nice and friendly evening and I decided I should go to Möku before going home. I got there at about 8pm and was greeted by Joosep and Johhi. I had a few cups of tea, some water, had a good chat and listened to good music. A truly nice ending to an interesting weekend.

In conclusion, this weekend I found that being sober is very possible, not even very difficult, but it can get quite annoying if you're surrounded by loud drunks. Sure, what else could I expect from a bar. It is nice, however, that most of my friends support me in my curious endeavour.

On next week's blog: Tuesday with Andres (to be confirmed), Friday (friday gonna get down whatever), Saturday lan-day (which, I'd imagine, won't be a very interesting read, so I'll think about writing about it)

Kevinday

Friday. Day five of my seemingly endless suffering.

So the evening started off as usual. I started getting calls at about half past seven and I went to Nälg for a bite to eat a bit before 8 pm. Nälg is a curious little place, even a bit hipsterish, as the whole place is designed as really oldschool, with soviet-era furnishing, VHS cassettes where you're supposed to keep books and this whole oldish atmosphere. I like the place and I usually like the food. This time, not so much, but I won't delve deeper into that, as it is completely unimportant. It was a bit strange, as I usually have a beer with my meal, but not this time, otherwise this thing here would be rather pointless.

After the light but costly meal, I went to Möku, as I usually do. As I was nearing the place I like to call home, I noticed a girl, who I shall, for anonymity's sake, call Kevin. We had a brief chat about her being there despite her earlier mentioning that she would not go there while I write this thing. The fact that I would replace her name with Kevin seemed to calm her down. We soon went inside and I was greeted by Sille-Liis and Kris, who were working on that fateful day. Upon explaining my curious predicament, Kris told me a story about he and a fellow colleague once did the same thing and how bad it was. Very encouraging indeed, but I think that I'll manage to make my sobriety at least somewhat interesting. This blog does help. There was also Kevin's friend, who I shall also call Kevin, mostly because I've completely forgotten his name. So there I sat, with Kevin between me and Kevin. I ordered tea. I had a lot of tea. I don't even know how much tea I had. Good tea, not so good tea. I'll now stop mentioning tea.

As the evening progressed, so did the intoxication of both Kevin and Kevin. At some point Kevin ran out of funds and I bought him a glass of whiskey. We talked about general stuff, but I did notice that I tend to suck at joking when I'm sober. I told some really lame jokes and puns, which I shall not repeat, as it would tremendously hurt my reputation as a funny person, which I usually think I am when I'm drunk.

So there I was, all around me people getting progressively drunk. A few people didn't like the idea of me being sober, including Jeka, who tried to offer me a drink they were enjoying. Something Tequila-like, but from either Romania or something like that. Not sure, didn't try. Then again some people congratulated me on taking on this complicated ordeal. Kevin wanted to make a bet with me, that she would buy me two beers when I fail. Kevin also tried to make another bet concerning me buying him a case of beer if I failed. Oh those Kevins and their bets. Some time later I was joined by the girls who called me earlier and I found out that one of them, who I shall call Kevin, is also sober this month. We may as well call it Sober January, as I'm sure a lot of people are having a sober month after the ordeal of Christmas and New Years and the week between the two.

At some point Möku got overrun with people, as it typically does on a Friday night, but being sober, I found it rather uncomfortable. It's really best to be drunk at these times, but I pushed on.
Some time later another girl showed up, who I shall also call Kevin, just to mess with your heads. Since she didn't find a spot near us, she joined Jeka and some other people at the end of the bar and I was left next to Kevin and some young punks, who I shall also call Kevin because I really don't remember the name of the one I talked to. Interesting chat there and curiously enough, no alcohol involved on my side. Kevin had a few beers and left at some point.

Now, Kevin had gotten himself quite drunk and decided to leave me and Kevin there, at which point Kevin got worried that all her friends left her there all alone, meanwhile I'm wondering what am I then.
Some time later, Maria arrived and joined Kevin in a conversation, so I was pretty much just sitting there on my own and thinking about what I would blog about when I got home. Some more time later I got tired of people pushing around me to get a drink at the bar, so I decided that me and Kevin would leave. This was at about half past midnight. So she finished her drink, I finished my water and we went on our merry way after bidding farewell to Kevin and Maria outside.

Since Kevin decided to try our luck at the Foosball table at Zavood, we headed that way. Zavood was really crowded at the time we got there and at that point it was only getting worse. We met another person we earlier met at Möku, who I shall also call Kevin, just to make things more interesting. Kevin and Kevin had a chat and I went on to greet all the friends of mine, including a co-worker, who I shall also refer to as Kevin. Kevin had come from a party with my old classmate, who I was also quite happy to see. I soon struggled through the masses to the Foosball table and found it quite occupied. Me and Kevin stood there watching the game and he even got to play a game himself. I didn't and I found that to be a good thing, as my arm has this weird pain it gets when I've played lately. Probably because I tend to play aggressively.

So anyway, I was soon joined by Kevin, who wanted to play, but seeing as we had no chance, me and her soon left. We went to Krooks. As you might guess, Krooks was also filled with all kinds of people, including Kevin who I had met in Möku earlier. Not sure if she was still sober, but I didn't see her drinking, so I'm guessing she was. Since we didn't have any room or any friends there besides Kevin, we soon decided to leave Krooks. I figured it was time to call it a night and Kevin found it best to go back to Zavood. I bid her farewell and while unpacking my trusty player, I overheard some drunk people across the street arguing about the best way to curse in Russian. Interesting.

Which brings me to the very fortunate end to my rather uneventful evening. Earlier on, when me and Kevin were leaving Zavood, at the front door there was an old beggar by the name of Lembit. He is a great person, really friendly and very grateful for any positive attention he got from people. Some people just don't have much luck in life and I'm guessing some of it had to do with alcohol, too. On this fateful evening, he looked a bit beaten up and was sitting on a trashcan next to wooden crutches. I've known him for a while and I tend to help people when I can. As he told me his brief but sad story about hunger and recent hospitalization, I gave him my last cash, 10€ and said goodbye. Now, this is important because of what happened on my way home. I was walking down a long street I always walk on when on my way home from the center, listening to melancholic love song by Mumford and Sons when I found the exact amount of 10€ in the middle of the street, with nobody around to claim it, so I picked it up. In the end I gave 10€ to a poor man while later gaining the same amount by sheer luck. I'm sure someone misses those 10€, but if I wouldn't have picked it up, someone else would have.
So I say a pretty good return on my investment.

No regrets.

tl;dr - An uneventful Friday night with a surprising end.

Wednesday

Day three in my race for immortality in the history books as.. well.. me being sober for a month.
I didn't write anything in the last few days, because they've been incredibly dull and uneventful. Today, however, I tested out my theory about going to a pub and not having any alcohol.

So today after work, as it's become a bit of a tradition, I went to Möku. A local pub I like to call home.
I was greeted by Sille-Liis and Roosi, who when she saw me, grabbed a glass and was about to pour me a beer, when I exclaimed loudly: "Stop!" For a moment the confused bartenders looked at me with a puzzled look until I told them about my little project. I had tea instead. I've never had tea in Möku before. It was peppermint and I loaded it with a heap of brown sugar, which made it really dark. It actually looked a bit like tea with something strong, like Stroh or Jägermeister.

Upon explaining my curious project, Sille-Liis told me I should blog about it. That makes about three people who have suggested this, so I guess I'm going to have to do it. Wait, I am doing it, aren't I?

Anyway, the night was quiet and the bar was occupied by some german youngsters who at some point decided it would be a great idea to have the bartenders play some awful german music. We figured it must have been a joke or something. Later we were joined by more girls and we went on discussing things. General things.

All in all, I would say the night was a success. I had some social interaction, some fun, saw friends and left early enough to catch a bus. I drank about four cups of tea of different sorts and noticed that it doesn't differ much from drinking beer, because you pretty much have to pee as often as with beer.

On a separate note, Veiko finally put up the Wall of Fame, so me and many other people have been immortalized for ages. In a thousand years, alien races will come to this ravished and destroyed planet to discover the secrets of times of old and will dig out a large slab of alumini and plastic on which they will discover a bunch of pictures, among which they will see my mug and will base their assumptions on the human race on the discovery. Surely they will decide that ancient humans were hairy and with bad eyesight. History will be rewritten and I will be seen as an ancient ruler of this weird planet, which in ancient writing would have been called Möku.

With seeing as today was not at all a failure or boring, I will go out again on Friday. That should turn out to be a bit more interesting, as I will probably encounter, with my sober eyes, the horror of drunk youngsters of Tartu. Not that I've never seen them, but drunk people are so much nicer and more interesting when you're really drunk yourself.

Wake up in the morning feeling like P.Diddy...

I don't really know much about that other than it being from a song by a popstar called Ke$ha about another popstar named P.Diddy, who supposedly has problems waking up in the morning due to the excess consumption of intoxicating substances. Since today is one of the days I feel like Ke$ha who is feeling like P.Diddy, I only saw it fitting to start this post off with it. Today is January the first, year 2012, which may or may not be the last year of human existance, but what I do know is that the first month of this year is likely to be more or less interesting. That or horribly boring. What, you ask, has this 2012 have so special it deserves special mention?

On a very early morning of the 31st of December, in a local pub, while slightly more than moredately intoxicated, me and a good friend of mine made a peculiar pact. We decided that we would stop drinking for a whole month in the beginning of the next year. Since we didn't plan to go cold turkey when the clock hits 12 midnight, we found that it would be best to start our ordeal with the second day of January. While I'm not much for pacts and such, maybe it was the fact that I hadn't had a sober week since the end of 2009, maybe it was my health that has been acting up, maybe it was just me being tired of all that's been going on, or rather not going on, I agreed.

So Fuck You, life, I'm going cold turkey until February the second.

At least I'll try.

I know what you're thinking. "I know this guy, he could easily turn off from the world and no-life for a month. Another playthrough of Skyrim or some other painfully long game would make that month just fly by!" Sure, that's the easy way out, but I have a mission here. I plan to continue with my current lifestyle of being out and about, meeting new people, seeing friends and ending up seeing postal workers doing their rounds at 5am on a work-night. Well, I'll try to refrain from that last part, like I always do.

So here's to hoping that today will be my last morning with a hangover for at least a month.